Lately, I have to admit that I have been struggling with something. There has been a war raging in my head. In the last month or so I've had trouble sleeping at night, and the thought has been consistently with me throughout my day. I am truly troubled with the current state of our youth. I know that, to older generations, it always seems as if the youth of their day is heading on a path of destruction. The latest music is blasphemy to their ears, overly violent & sexual. Their manners have vanished. "Please" & "Thank you" are terms only in the distant past. Respect to their elders is as common as snowfall on the equator, on & on...
I tend to agree with all of the thoughts above. However, my question is "why has this come to be?". I can't begin to think that I have all of the answers at the age of 25. I don't believe that their DNA has genetically been altered to produce such behavior. However, I do believe that the culture in which our older generations have surrounded our youth with has cultivated their current state. Do we as a society hold our children & our students accountable for their transgressions? What expectations do we hold for our young people? It seems to me that we tend to turn a blind eye to undesirable actions for fear of alienating them. If we as parents, coaches, & educators do not set & hold the standards in which our youth should live by, who will provide the example?
Teachers having affairs with students is far too prevalent. Public servants being involved in lawless impropriety is far too common. Divorce rates are off the charts. Adultery within our marriages show our youth that vows & promises can be taken back. Value of human life has been reduced to a mere number & a choice. It's safe to say that our spine is as flimsy as a jellyfish in the sea. The examples being set should be in a book of life of "What NOT To Do'
Hollywood has tainted human values. Kids spend countless hours exposed to reality television such as Jersey Shore & Teen Mom. Shows in which cameras follow cast members around & catch their most outrageous actions, shouting matches, sexual adventures, slothfulness, & party habits on film & display them weekly for teens to take in. In many cases, young people see these people as idols & celebrate their stupidity, drunkeness, or irresponsible actions. What happened to television in which wholesome living & human decency were celebrated? How many tv shows are produced in the 21st Century that relate to shows like The Andy Griffith Show or I Love Lucy? At the end of every episode there seemed to be a lesson in life or the greater good in which could be learned from. Perhaps the greater sin is not Hollywood producing this "trash", but the older generations viewing them as acceptable entertainment for our youth & letting them into our homes.
Rarely do families sit down at the dinner table for a family meal & take the time to discuss their day. How many parents & teachers are unaware of the problems that our youth are facing or are caught blindsided by unthinkable acts such as Newtown, Connecticut? Most of the issue lies in the fact that we don't take the time to talk to our children & our students & give them guidance in which to properly help solve or rectify their problems. Children & young adults need our attention, not our money or frivolous possessions. They need to be nurtured & shown they are loved. We are confused as to why school shootings & other atrocities occur with no remorse, that the perpetrator seems "cold" & "distant". Were they told they were loved or care for? We should actively seek to teach them lessons in the fair treatment of others & the warm rewards we feel as a result of giving. How selfish is it to turn them away so their "problems" don't cause inconvenience our own lives?
Our apathy & lack of attention from the older generation has given way to many of the problems our youth face. The problem is not our youth. It is in their DNA to be curious, to push the envelope. However, it is OUR responsibility to offer steadfast & consistent guidance to assure that good & evil are separated. Right & wrong are black & white. However, the "gray area" is rapidly growing. It is up to us to draw the line in the sand & to defend goodness, accountability, respect, & chivalry with an iron & unwavering shield. We must not be afraid of how they will perceive our guidance. In the end, such as I did, they will come to understand why their parents & leaders set forth their rules & expectations. Our youth need to be protected from indecency & worldly evil, not thrown into the fire to make their own decisions. You wouldn't throw an untrained soldier into the field of battle without preparing him to fight for himself. We are preparing our youth for a war of good & evil. So please, don't be afraid to pick up your sword, stand your ground, & fight the good fight. Evil only prevails when good people do nothing to stop it...
Thursday, February 21, 2013
Monday, February 4, 2013
My Big Brother
For those of you who know my brother, this article will do nothing other than reiterate what you already know. For those of you who don't, I would like to the opportunity to share a little about the man whom I have looked up to for my entire life, one of the most selfless & genuine people you will ever meet.
Big brothers have the uncommon ability to test a younger sibling. They know exactly how to push every button you posses that conjures up emotions of anger within you that not even the wrath of Zeus could muster. They have an ability to grind down your emotions to your inner core. Almost certainly in your early years, they know you even better than you know yourself. However, let me shed a little light on the other side of the coin, one not necessarily seen by others. Let me tell you who my big brother is and his lasting influence on me.
Both of my brothers have had a great influence on my life. Perhaps due to our closeness in age, more of my time as a youth was probably spent with Derrick. Growing up on a farm in the middle of the strip pits in the heart of Southeast Kansas, entertainment was hard to find. Left with little choice and only three tv channels, we spent most of our time playing sports. It didn't matter the time of day, inside or out, we were actively engaged in emulating our favorite figures in each sport. The living room served as a ballpark, basketball arena, and gridiron stadium. With the separation of years between us, the athletic ability marked quite a measure of difference. Instead of putting on a beat-down comparable to a five star football program on a cupcake football team, my brother would find a way to even the playing field. In fact, he would unselfishly give himself the disadvantage. Perhaps my favorite games to play, he dubbed "Interception" & "Fumble". In each setting he would start as the offensive player and undoubtedly either throw a pass intended to be picked off or lose control of the football. My objective would be to return the ball to the end zone, the other side of the living room or to the couch, for a touchdown. He, also, played the entirety of the game from his knees. When playing NCAA tournaments on our full-court gravel arena, he would never guard my three-point shots and shoot with his left hand. I was always Kansas, North Carolina, or some other high profile program. He would represent the underdog, most commonly Providence or Richmond, etc. Every event was broadcast in his Gus Johnson announcer voice. Talk about heightened drama! Although many times, I would call him a cheater if I lost, throw the ball at him in disgust of a bad call, he threatened to never play with me again....Forty-five minutes later he would come find me in my pouty state and ask that we try again. No matter how I treated him or what I said, he would give me another try. Those games could not have been very fun for him since they were entirely tailored to me. It took me a long time to realize how selfless his actions were.
Entering high school, he would drag me to 6 A.M. weights where there might only be a total of eight guys showing up. He never allowed himself to sit down in his three hour workout. (A rule I implemented with our kids at the high school now) At 10 o'clock in the morning in the blazing summer sun, he put me through unrighteous, mile & a half sprint workouts with just the two of us on the track. Whether he just wanted the company or not, he was instilling a discipline & work ethic in me that would stay with me to this day. Track workouts that our athletes suffer through in our off-season, summer conditioning now. He was my idol, my role model. He always looked out for my best interests. One Friday night, I witnessed him take a hit to the chin that required stitches. The trainer wanted to deaden the area before proceeding. In order to speed the process, he declined anethesia & took the needle & the stitches cold. He never missed an offensive play. His toughness was unparalleled, but I came to realize he would sacrifice anything for his teammates and those around them.
Derrick went on the play football at Pittsburg State. Though he never saw much playing time, he stuck with it for all five years. I'll never forget him telling the story of the first time he ran through the tunnel. A few of my most cherished moments are the embraces we shared after losing in the state quarterfinals in Rossville, in which he drove four hours to even though he had a game the following day, and the sub-state victory in basketball of my senior season. He was always there for me in my failures & my successes whether they brought tears of overwhelming joy or excruciating sadness.
He is now is the Head Football coach at Riverton High School. His discipline, selflessness, & good nature remain a part of his daily life. He treats his players as if they were his own children, with respect & dignity. I can identify with the example he sets for them on a daily basis & I can say that they are truly blessed. Now married & with a son of his own, he demonstrates the same loving devotion that he gave me in my childhood with his own family.
My brother would never elaborate on his awesome personal characteristics. His humility would never allow him to. Although Derrick & I may have different coaching personalities, his being calm & collected and mine being a little more outwardly excitable, I still carry many of the values & principles he instilled in me. And although I'll never have a little brother of my own, perhaps I can influence my players the way he did me. I can honestly say that any little brother who is as fortunate to have a big brother like I did, is the luckiest kid on the planet.
Happy Birthday big brother! I hope it's the best one yet & there are many more to come. Whether you would ever admit it to anyone or not, you are an amazing individual and those around you are blessed to have been touched by your influence...
Big brothers have the uncommon ability to test a younger sibling. They know exactly how to push every button you posses that conjures up emotions of anger within you that not even the wrath of Zeus could muster. They have an ability to grind down your emotions to your inner core. Almost certainly in your early years, they know you even better than you know yourself. However, let me shed a little light on the other side of the coin, one not necessarily seen by others. Let me tell you who my big brother is and his lasting influence on me.
Both of my brothers have had a great influence on my life. Perhaps due to our closeness in age, more of my time as a youth was probably spent with Derrick. Growing up on a farm in the middle of the strip pits in the heart of Southeast Kansas, entertainment was hard to find. Left with little choice and only three tv channels, we spent most of our time playing sports. It didn't matter the time of day, inside or out, we were actively engaged in emulating our favorite figures in each sport. The living room served as a ballpark, basketball arena, and gridiron stadium. With the separation of years between us, the athletic ability marked quite a measure of difference. Instead of putting on a beat-down comparable to a five star football program on a cupcake football team, my brother would find a way to even the playing field. In fact, he would unselfishly give himself the disadvantage. Perhaps my favorite games to play, he dubbed "Interception" & "Fumble". In each setting he would start as the offensive player and undoubtedly either throw a pass intended to be picked off or lose control of the football. My objective would be to return the ball to the end zone, the other side of the living room or to the couch, for a touchdown. He, also, played the entirety of the game from his knees. When playing NCAA tournaments on our full-court gravel arena, he would never guard my three-point shots and shoot with his left hand. I was always Kansas, North Carolina, or some other high profile program. He would represent the underdog, most commonly Providence or Richmond, etc. Every event was broadcast in his Gus Johnson announcer voice. Talk about heightened drama! Although many times, I would call him a cheater if I lost, throw the ball at him in disgust of a bad call, he threatened to never play with me again....Forty-five minutes later he would come find me in my pouty state and ask that we try again. No matter how I treated him or what I said, he would give me another try. Those games could not have been very fun for him since they were entirely tailored to me. It took me a long time to realize how selfless his actions were.
Entering high school, he would drag me to 6 A.M. weights where there might only be a total of eight guys showing up. He never allowed himself to sit down in his three hour workout. (A rule I implemented with our kids at the high school now) At 10 o'clock in the morning in the blazing summer sun, he put me through unrighteous, mile & a half sprint workouts with just the two of us on the track. Whether he just wanted the company or not, he was instilling a discipline & work ethic in me that would stay with me to this day. Track workouts that our athletes suffer through in our off-season, summer conditioning now. He was my idol, my role model. He always looked out for my best interests. One Friday night, I witnessed him take a hit to the chin that required stitches. The trainer wanted to deaden the area before proceeding. In order to speed the process, he declined anethesia & took the needle & the stitches cold. He never missed an offensive play. His toughness was unparalleled, but I came to realize he would sacrifice anything for his teammates and those around them.
Derrick went on the play football at Pittsburg State. Though he never saw much playing time, he stuck with it for all five years. I'll never forget him telling the story of the first time he ran through the tunnel. A few of my most cherished moments are the embraces we shared after losing in the state quarterfinals in Rossville, in which he drove four hours to even though he had a game the following day, and the sub-state victory in basketball of my senior season. He was always there for me in my failures & my successes whether they brought tears of overwhelming joy or excruciating sadness.
He is now is the Head Football coach at Riverton High School. His discipline, selflessness, & good nature remain a part of his daily life. He treats his players as if they were his own children, with respect & dignity. I can identify with the example he sets for them on a daily basis & I can say that they are truly blessed. Now married & with a son of his own, he demonstrates the same loving devotion that he gave me in my childhood with his own family.
My brother would never elaborate on his awesome personal characteristics. His humility would never allow him to. Although Derrick & I may have different coaching personalities, his being calm & collected and mine being a little more outwardly excitable, I still carry many of the values & principles he instilled in me. And although I'll never have a little brother of my own, perhaps I can influence my players the way he did me. I can honestly say that any little brother who is as fortunate to have a big brother like I did, is the luckiest kid on the planet.
Happy Birthday big brother! I hope it's the best one yet & there are many more to come. Whether you would ever admit it to anyone or not, you are an amazing individual and those around you are blessed to have been touched by your influence...
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